As I come back from my travels and have been home for a couple of months I've started to see my generation in a new light. I'm calling it the NOWSAH Generation, the Not Okay With Sitting At Home Generation. Adults, kids, people, or whatever you want to call people my age are no longer okay with sitting at home.
We hear about the injustice, the struggle, the hurt, the poverty around us, both in the United States and globally and we aren't okay with it. When I was in 11th grade I first heard of Invisible Children and I cried for the kids who were being abducted to become child soldiers. My freshman year in college I learned of TOMS and their efforts to give kids shoes. Last year my friend wrote about prostitutes in Israel and I wept for a woman who sold herself. I went to Nepal and saw kids who were only 16 and had been living on the streets with no family for 10 years. I met kids who didn't know the last time they were sober. I met a 16 year old who ran away from home because her family was abusive, but the streets made her sleep with older boys so she, in return, would have protection from other men who would rape her.
I met a first grader in Thailand who the week before had been abducted by a man on a motorcycle and if she had not been left on the side of the road, would have been sold into modern day slavery. I saw men on the beach in Thailand, who's one purpose was to get drunk and buy sex from a Thai woman.
I learned how to train and equip people against the reality of human/ sex trafficking. I saw the realities of it in front of me. I met people who had been in the system. I met people trying to stop it from happening.
Through all I've seen, I've learned the people around me feel the same way. We are not okay with what we see happening in the world. We are not okay that people live in the streets in our own cities. We are not okay with kids going without food, clothing, and education. We are not okay with children anywhere living on the streets. We are not okay with the world around us.
We have become the generation that is trying to prevent, stop, and educate others about what the real world is like. I wept when I read my friends email about prostitutes in Israel. I wept harder when I met prostitutes in Nepal. I was angered by the fact that slavery is at an all time high. I felt the need to educate myself and bring education to others about it. I buy shoes that give kids a pair in return. I am not okay sitting at home and doing nothing about the injustice I see all around me.
I don't think you are either. I don't think you care about every cause there is. But I do think that you are not okay with what you see around you. I challenge you to not sit at home. I bet you already know what you are not okay with. Change that situation. You may be on little voice, but it goes a long way.
It may seem silly that I buy the same kind of shoes. But I know with that shoe I gave another kid a chance in this world by putting shoes on their feet. It may seem dumb that I'm starting a business to benefit people in Nepal and in Las Vegas and hopefully one day globally. But I'm not okay with what I saw. I'm not okay with what I see. But I am okay with my generation.
They may get drunk and watch too much Jersey Shore, but I see people around me fighting for a cause. I see people educating themselves about the struggle this world is in. I see them buying products to help a cause. It may only be $10 dollars that they give. But $10 USD in another country can go a long way.
We are the generation that is standing up. We are not okay with sitting at home. We may live at home, we may never meet the people these products benefit, we might not even live to see our cause come to completion, but we are a generation that is trying to make the unheard have a voice. We are trying to stand for justice. We are trying to change the world.
Call us crazy, dumb, or uneducated. But we are trying.
Wednesday, March 7, 2012
Thursday, December 1, 2011
Fighting For A Hope
I have some time so I figured I would reel you all what I'm heading into for life.
DTS has needless to say been life changing for me. During lecture phase I learned a lot about God but also learned a lot about myself. Saw problems that I need to hammer out and saw things in my life that I needed to change. I saw what was motivating me and driving me to be all that I wanted to be.
If you would have asked me before dts what I would do in life I would have told you that I'd be a wife and mom and probably a history teacher or missions coordinator for s church. I really wanted those things. Buy I don't think I was satisfied with that. I want to be in the mission field I wanted to make an impact in the world that lasted past these six months but u had no idea what that meant or how I would do it so I settled on being a mom and teacher.
God however has a much better plan for me and my life and I've learned it and seen it. One of the weeks during lecture phase we were talking about evangelism and our speaker was from a base on the east side of Australia. He was super chill and does weekly reaches out to surfers and backpackers in the area. This is something I've always wanted to do but again I didn't think it was possible.
You have to know that I've always joked around with friends about starting a coffee shop, buy never actually think I would start one. But one day our speaker started to talk about ways to evangelize and meet people where they were at and talked about how he wanted to start a coffee shop to reach out to surfers and the community.
My jaw literally dropped. It's something ive always wanted. At lunch that day I talked to him about it and as he talked his plans for this shop was everything I've wanted. It literally lined up with what I wanted. I was in total disbelief over this and wanted to jump for joy.
As that week went on I kept feeling prompted to talk to our speaker about joining his staff. At the end of the week after I had several people pray for me I realized that this is what I was supposed to do.
But that's just the start.
After talking with him about moving to Australia abs what that would mean and look like I started to prepare myself mentally for this move. I attitude with the idea of school. The only reason I was there was because I wanted to please others and in fact really don't like college. I gave up school. Let it into Gods hands to do what he wanted with it. I did not think I would be returning and only after I was completely okay with not finishing did I get the okay to finish my last semester and get my degree. I don't think it will help me but I will finish school.
While in Nepal I started to find a heart for the country and trying to think of something I could do because for me seven weeks wasn't enough. And I wanted to help not only Nepal but many places. But where I could start I had no idea.
I one day thought about my Toms shoes. They have become very holey over my time and I was thinking about new ones. I love the shoes. I live that I buy a pair and a child gets a pair. I think it's an amazing program. I realized I could do the same thing. But not shoes. Instead I would bring clean water, mosquito nets, awareness and training to deal with modern day slavery and the prevention of it. I would sell water bottles and that would bring clean water. I would have shirts that would then provide mosquito nets. And much more.
This made me so happy. I couldn't be in Nepal forever. I'm not called there, but I could make an impact there. I know that westerners want to help the need that is out there but they usually want something in return which my vision is going to fulfill.
While continuing on the trip I thought of more products that could be sold to fund projects. Not just Nepal but America too and Africa and Thailand and everywhere. The passion on me built.
By the time I got to Kathmandu I was ready to start this company at that moment when I went to the streets to meet and work with street kids and prostitutes. My first day slapped me in the face. I met children who were 16 and had been on the streets for over ten years. They had scars not arms. Cutting was a fad in middle school that kids around me did "to feel like they were alive". These kids cut because they have no other way to feel alive. The rats in the country are of more worth then these kids. Between sniffing glue and being drunk these kids are rarely in a sobered state of mind. The people I worked with brought these kids hope. Hope that they could change. Hope that the prostitute no longer had to raise her kids in the park and leave them there while she made the equivalent of two US dollars.
I went home that day and wept. Telling the kids that Jesus loved them wasn't enough. Telling a man dressed as a women selling himself to other men while he lives with HIV that times get better wasn't enough. I felt so helpless. That night I journaled to try and make sense of the day and my life and what these people I worked with did.
That's when it hit me that everyone I have worked with are fighting for hope. They were doing something much more then just telling them that Jesus loved them. They were working with them, showing them love, providing them with jobs so they could have hope. And that's what I want my coffee shops to do. I want to bring hope to people.
So I will be starting a line of shirts, bags, jewelry, water bottles, coffee mugs, and more under a new line called fighting for hope. The profits of the products will go to provide services to people to go out to bring others hope. I've met a lot of people and want to meet many more that are dedicated to seeing this happen.
So I'm going to own a coffee shop. One in Australia and more in the states. They will reach the people where they are at and meet others through the products I sell. I want you to fight with me. It's been clear what I'm going to do. I've seen the hurt, the pain, the poverty, the injustice and I'm not okay to just know it. I want to fight to bring a better life to people. Modern day slavery is real, children wearing nothing is real, prostitution is real, the movie "taken" is real, slums are real. And I cam bring them hope. You can bring them hope. We can bring them hope.
In Kathmandu on my last day of ministry and full day in the country I met with a girl who I had met before. She is sixteen and ran from home. After trying to go back her patents deny knowing her. She had just run away from prison where she was arrested for doing nothing wrong, she was beat and locked up with others for days with little food. She relies on a few older boys to protect her and even "married" one of them. For the protection that they provide she has to sleep with them and provide other sexual acts. She refuses to sniff glue like the others and wanted desperately to get off the street and go home. We sat and talked with her for over an hour. The pain in her eyes was much more than any 16 year old should have. I was sitting a couple inches above her rubbing her back. After a while she fell asleep hugging my knees as I rubbed her back. Her shirt had some kind of writing on it that with her elbow bent spelled out "coffee". I could no longer hold back the tears I had for her and silently cried as she got a half hour of protected sleep. Nothing could harm her while I was around. She could forget about the pain for a short while as I held her.
If I could I would have taken her and given her a new life I would have. She's the reason I'm fighting. She needs hope and I'm going to bring it to her. She needs hope.
Without hope, there's No reason to life. So let's bring the world a hope that they so desperately seek for.
DTS has needless to say been life changing for me. During lecture phase I learned a lot about God but also learned a lot about myself. Saw problems that I need to hammer out and saw things in my life that I needed to change. I saw what was motivating me and driving me to be all that I wanted to be.
If you would have asked me before dts what I would do in life I would have told you that I'd be a wife and mom and probably a history teacher or missions coordinator for s church. I really wanted those things. Buy I don't think I was satisfied with that. I want to be in the mission field I wanted to make an impact in the world that lasted past these six months but u had no idea what that meant or how I would do it so I settled on being a mom and teacher.
God however has a much better plan for me and my life and I've learned it and seen it. One of the weeks during lecture phase we were talking about evangelism and our speaker was from a base on the east side of Australia. He was super chill and does weekly reaches out to surfers and backpackers in the area. This is something I've always wanted to do but again I didn't think it was possible.
You have to know that I've always joked around with friends about starting a coffee shop, buy never actually think I would start one. But one day our speaker started to talk about ways to evangelize and meet people where they were at and talked about how he wanted to start a coffee shop to reach out to surfers and the community.
My jaw literally dropped. It's something ive always wanted. At lunch that day I talked to him about it and as he talked his plans for this shop was everything I've wanted. It literally lined up with what I wanted. I was in total disbelief over this and wanted to jump for joy.
As that week went on I kept feeling prompted to talk to our speaker about joining his staff. At the end of the week after I had several people pray for me I realized that this is what I was supposed to do.
But that's just the start.
After talking with him about moving to Australia abs what that would mean and look like I started to prepare myself mentally for this move. I attitude with the idea of school. The only reason I was there was because I wanted to please others and in fact really don't like college. I gave up school. Let it into Gods hands to do what he wanted with it. I did not think I would be returning and only after I was completely okay with not finishing did I get the okay to finish my last semester and get my degree. I don't think it will help me but I will finish school.
While in Nepal I started to find a heart for the country and trying to think of something I could do because for me seven weeks wasn't enough. And I wanted to help not only Nepal but many places. But where I could start I had no idea.
I one day thought about my Toms shoes. They have become very holey over my time and I was thinking about new ones. I love the shoes. I live that I buy a pair and a child gets a pair. I think it's an amazing program. I realized I could do the same thing. But not shoes. Instead I would bring clean water, mosquito nets, awareness and training to deal with modern day slavery and the prevention of it. I would sell water bottles and that would bring clean water. I would have shirts that would then provide mosquito nets. And much more.
This made me so happy. I couldn't be in Nepal forever. I'm not called there, but I could make an impact there. I know that westerners want to help the need that is out there but they usually want something in return which my vision is going to fulfill.
While continuing on the trip I thought of more products that could be sold to fund projects. Not just Nepal but America too and Africa and Thailand and everywhere. The passion on me built.
By the time I got to Kathmandu I was ready to start this company at that moment when I went to the streets to meet and work with street kids and prostitutes. My first day slapped me in the face. I met children who were 16 and had been on the streets for over ten years. They had scars not arms. Cutting was a fad in middle school that kids around me did "to feel like they were alive". These kids cut because they have no other way to feel alive. The rats in the country are of more worth then these kids. Between sniffing glue and being drunk these kids are rarely in a sobered state of mind. The people I worked with brought these kids hope. Hope that they could change. Hope that the prostitute no longer had to raise her kids in the park and leave them there while she made the equivalent of two US dollars.
I went home that day and wept. Telling the kids that Jesus loved them wasn't enough. Telling a man dressed as a women selling himself to other men while he lives with HIV that times get better wasn't enough. I felt so helpless. That night I journaled to try and make sense of the day and my life and what these people I worked with did.
That's when it hit me that everyone I have worked with are fighting for hope. They were doing something much more then just telling them that Jesus loved them. They were working with them, showing them love, providing them with jobs so they could have hope. And that's what I want my coffee shops to do. I want to bring hope to people.
So I will be starting a line of shirts, bags, jewelry, water bottles, coffee mugs, and more under a new line called fighting for hope. The profits of the products will go to provide services to people to go out to bring others hope. I've met a lot of people and want to meet many more that are dedicated to seeing this happen.
So I'm going to own a coffee shop. One in Australia and more in the states. They will reach the people where they are at and meet others through the products I sell. I want you to fight with me. It's been clear what I'm going to do. I've seen the hurt, the pain, the poverty, the injustice and I'm not okay to just know it. I want to fight to bring a better life to people. Modern day slavery is real, children wearing nothing is real, prostitution is real, the movie "taken" is real, slums are real. And I cam bring them hope. You can bring them hope. We can bring them hope.
In Kathmandu on my last day of ministry and full day in the country I met with a girl who I had met before. She is sixteen and ran from home. After trying to go back her patents deny knowing her. She had just run away from prison where she was arrested for doing nothing wrong, she was beat and locked up with others for days with little food. She relies on a few older boys to protect her and even "married" one of them. For the protection that they provide she has to sleep with them and provide other sexual acts. She refuses to sniff glue like the others and wanted desperately to get off the street and go home. We sat and talked with her for over an hour. The pain in her eyes was much more than any 16 year old should have. I was sitting a couple inches above her rubbing her back. After a while she fell asleep hugging my knees as I rubbed her back. Her shirt had some kind of writing on it that with her elbow bent spelled out "coffee". I could no longer hold back the tears I had for her and silently cried as she got a half hour of protected sleep. Nothing could harm her while I was around. She could forget about the pain for a short while as I held her.
If I could I would have taken her and given her a new life I would have. She's the reason I'm fighting. She needs hope and I'm going to bring it to her. She needs hope.
Without hope, there's No reason to life. So let's bring the world a hope that they so desperately seek for.
Sunday, October 23, 2011
Greetings from Asia!
This is the first time i have sat down at a computer and not my phone so i figured i would send out a decent update! i miss all of you and am very thankful for all your support!
we have just completed our fourth week here which means that we are officially half way through our time in our first country and a third of the way done with our total outreach time. our time here has been great! the first week we participated in the national conference here. it was an easy start to outreach and we got to meet a lot of the people we were going to work with in the following weeks.
the second location we went to was in the same city but up in the mountains; there we did a kids camp in the morning then door to door in the afternoon usually followed by an open air. we did some major hiking that week!!! it was very cool for us because the number of people that we had come each day doubled in size. their holy week with the Hindu religion was the same week that we were there. the day before their most holy day (like our Christmas) we had over 180 people come out and listen to what we had to say! it was very exciting and fun for us; we got to share the Gospel with people who had never heard it before.
the next week we went and worked with a church planting team in another city/village area. they are currently helping start, train, and work with 9 churches/fellowships. we again did a lot of hiking. we also did our longest hike yet; it was five hours from the base of a mtn, up and around to the very top of another mtn. they said it would take us ten hours to do but we did it in five. it was probably one of the hardest physical things i have ever done before; the hike wasn't like any i have ever done before. it seemed like we were walking up 90 degree angles at some points although it probably was only 35. still that's a very steep hill to be walking up. once there we stayed for two nights and helped run a childrens program. we also played volleyball with the locals!
we hiked down two days later and continued to go to closer villages and fellowships to do kids programs and house fellowships. on our day off we were able to go by to a nearby waterfall and ended up showering there. it was def an experience since it was a public place and we showered with all our clothes on. but it was beautiful and fun and the cold water was very refreshing in the humidity and heat that we were in.
from there we traveled by a VERY bumpy long twelve hour night bus to our next location to a city near the border here we are working with another ywam team and helping them in their ministries. i was privileged enough to get to preach to a youth group with kids ages 17-25 during their church service. tomorrow we leave for a village about five hours away to work with them for about three days. we will come back here then head to the capital to finish off our last two weeks.
it has been such an amazing adventure. i have been pushed in so many ways. i dealt with sickness for about two weeks and had to learn to take care of myself. here the food is different which i expected but i have learned that i am almost totally lactose intolerant; that has been hard because some of my favorite things to eat involve milk but i'm learning i'd rather not be in pain for the rest of the day then the joy of having milk in my coffee.
the food here in wonderful though; i've liked almost everything i've tried and love to eat rice at most meals. they know how to cook vegetables so well here. soooo good!
the people have been amazing; i'm constantly surprised how nice the people are. even if they don't accept what we have to say they invite us in, make us coffee or freshly squeezed lemonade and listen intently to what we have to say. i think i mentioned but i had a 60 year old women offer to carry us down the mtn on her back so we wouldn't fall anymore. it's amazing. when people come to my door at home i usually don't answer; here the people invite you in and try to feed you everything that they own.
our teams and the translators have been amazing as well. i hate leaving each place; we have bonded with them so well. our last night after being with the first team they threw us a party and it turned into a very random but very fun dance party. at our second place we were fed the best home made food i've had since leaving home. they went out of their way to make food that didn't have meat in it the few times we had it for our vegetarian on our team. if we were sick or unwell they made sure we slept; one family even gave up their bed and their room to part of our team and they slept on the floor in the kitchen. they literally bend over backwards for us.
it has shown me a lot of how i need to be and how different our worlds are. i love home. without a doubt i love home but i realize that we are very distant from each other in the states. i am shocked everytime we just walk into someones yard and they invite us to sit down and rest; hospitality is the word for this country. i love it.
i will be coming back to this country without a doubt. the fist ministry spot has a part of my heart. i loved the team we were with and the village and the people; i cried leaving them and i'll be back again one day to visit.
our team is doing well. we rely on God for strength a lot; I don't think i could have made it on the five hour hike without Him. there was a point were we were in what we called the desert because it was so hot and we were clinging to the side of the mtn for an ounce of shade and literally all i could do was sing a worship song to get me through. and it did. you would think that a team of ten girls would have an abundance of problems but we have been working very well with one another. of course it gets hard and its tiring but we always seem to push through to encourage one another to keep going to the end.
it's been an awesome experience so far and i have loved almost every single moment.
i'm sorry that there is no capital letters here and spelling may be tragically wrong. but the internet cafe i'm at is a little older and not everything on the keyboard works probably.
continue to pray for strength for me and my team. email if you can. thank you so much for all your support. i will post pictures when i get back to australia; some are on facebook; if you are my FB friend you can see them! i love you and miss you all! blessings, tina!
we have just completed our fourth week here which means that we are officially half way through our time in our first country and a third of the way done with our total outreach time. our time here has been great! the first week we participated in the national conference here. it was an easy start to outreach and we got to meet a lot of the people we were going to work with in the following weeks.
the second location we went to was in the same city but up in the mountains; there we did a kids camp in the morning then door to door in the afternoon usually followed by an open air. we did some major hiking that week!!! it was very cool for us because the number of people that we had come each day doubled in size. their holy week with the Hindu religion was the same week that we were there. the day before their most holy day (like our Christmas) we had over 180 people come out and listen to what we had to say! it was very exciting and fun for us; we got to share the Gospel with people who had never heard it before.
the next week we went and worked with a church planting team in another city/village area. they are currently helping start, train, and work with 9 churches/fellowships. we again did a lot of hiking. we also did our longest hike yet; it was five hours from the base of a mtn, up and around to the very top of another mtn. they said it would take us ten hours to do but we did it in five. it was probably one of the hardest physical things i have ever done before; the hike wasn't like any i have ever done before. it seemed like we were walking up 90 degree angles at some points although it probably was only 35. still that's a very steep hill to be walking up. once there we stayed for two nights and helped run a childrens program. we also played volleyball with the locals!
we hiked down two days later and continued to go to closer villages and fellowships to do kids programs and house fellowships. on our day off we were able to go by to a nearby waterfall and ended up showering there. it was def an experience since it was a public place and we showered with all our clothes on. but it was beautiful and fun and the cold water was very refreshing in the humidity and heat that we were in.
from there we traveled by a VERY bumpy long twelve hour night bus to our next location to a city near the border here we are working with another ywam team and helping them in their ministries. i was privileged enough to get to preach to a youth group with kids ages 17-25 during their church service. tomorrow we leave for a village about five hours away to work with them for about three days. we will come back here then head to the capital to finish off our last two weeks.
it has been such an amazing adventure. i have been pushed in so many ways. i dealt with sickness for about two weeks and had to learn to take care of myself. here the food is different which i expected but i have learned that i am almost totally lactose intolerant; that has been hard because some of my favorite things to eat involve milk but i'm learning i'd rather not be in pain for the rest of the day then the joy of having milk in my coffee.
the food here in wonderful though; i've liked almost everything i've tried and love to eat rice at most meals. they know how to cook vegetables so well here. soooo good!
the people have been amazing; i'm constantly surprised how nice the people are. even if they don't accept what we have to say they invite us in, make us coffee or freshly squeezed lemonade and listen intently to what we have to say. i think i mentioned but i had a 60 year old women offer to carry us down the mtn on her back so we wouldn't fall anymore. it's amazing. when people come to my door at home i usually don't answer; here the people invite you in and try to feed you everything that they own.
our teams and the translators have been amazing as well. i hate leaving each place; we have bonded with them so well. our last night after being with the first team they threw us a party and it turned into a very random but very fun dance party. at our second place we were fed the best home made food i've had since leaving home. they went out of their way to make food that didn't have meat in it the few times we had it for our vegetarian on our team. if we were sick or unwell they made sure we slept; one family even gave up their bed and their room to part of our team and they slept on the floor in the kitchen. they literally bend over backwards for us.
it has shown me a lot of how i need to be and how different our worlds are. i love home. without a doubt i love home but i realize that we are very distant from each other in the states. i am shocked everytime we just walk into someones yard and they invite us to sit down and rest; hospitality is the word for this country. i love it.
i will be coming back to this country without a doubt. the fist ministry spot has a part of my heart. i loved the team we were with and the village and the people; i cried leaving them and i'll be back again one day to visit.
our team is doing well. we rely on God for strength a lot; I don't think i could have made it on the five hour hike without Him. there was a point were we were in what we called the desert because it was so hot and we were clinging to the side of the mtn for an ounce of shade and literally all i could do was sing a worship song to get me through. and it did. you would think that a team of ten girls would have an abundance of problems but we have been working very well with one another. of course it gets hard and its tiring but we always seem to push through to encourage one another to keep going to the end.
it's been an awesome experience so far and i have loved almost every single moment.
i'm sorry that there is no capital letters here and spelling may be tragically wrong. but the internet cafe i'm at is a little older and not everything on the keyboard works probably.
continue to pray for strength for me and my team. email if you can. thank you so much for all your support. i will post pictures when i get back to australia; some are on facebook; if you are my FB friend you can see them! i love you and miss you all! blessings, tina!
Tuesday, October 11, 2011
Update via Mia
Hey, this is Mia, Tina's Mom. She sent this on Saturday; internet access is extremely limited, I only hear from her every 10 days or so. Anyway, enjoy...
Hi! I'm writing this in bed at a hotel but I probably won't be able to send it til tomorrow morning. This past week has been so crazy and so good!
We were in the mountains looking at the tall, tall mountains everyday. In the morning we ran a kids camp and in the afternoon we did door to door and did open air. The mountains that we were in are near a major city but some people have never been out of the mountains. There were a (lot of?) smaller villages all around and we hiked to a lot of them. Most knew the name Jesus but had never heard the gospel before so it was really cool to be the first ones to share with people.
We did door to door which is actually hill to hill here. There was a long walk/treck to get there and we did it in traditional wear. In some villages we then took these little paths from house to house inviting them to open air events or sitting and talking with them. I'm telling you right now you will never meet a nicer person then these people.
Most would bend over backwards to help you and invite you in. And even if they didn't want to hear what you have to say they would still smile and were so thankful we were there. One lady in her sixties even followed us and offered to carry us down the mountain because we kept slipping. And she was serious. If we would have fallen she would have swooped us up and taken us on her back to our base.
Total fun part is that they live to dance here. Love is a understatement. They want you to dance like them then teach them to dance American. First off I didn't really know what American dance looks like and what I do wasn't appropriate for kids. So I taught them the chicken dance. And now they all know it and live it!
We worked with a training center here and even though they were small in number I was blessed in so many ways by them. There was one family and their two kids were amazing and they had so much life to them. Their little girl had the biggest most compassionate heart I've ever seen. Even thinking about how we had to say goodbye today is making me cry. This team was amazing. One is starting a resort in the mtns that will be a trekkers retreat/missionaries get away. It's employing locals in an economy with huge unemployment.
Then one lady was making our traditional outfits for us that we had to wear and the money that she made from them would go to pay her school fees for the school she is about to take.
And then our translators. To say they were a blessing is an understatement. One works with the base and the other two didn't. But all were amazing. I worked with one closely doing the kids ministry and door to door. He had such a passion for reaching out to his village and making sure everyone knew. He doesn't want his people to be bound by lies. He would always take us on door to door for longer then the time planned for. On the first day when we hardly knew him we ended up at his house during door to door and he made is freshly squeezed lemon aid. To say our jaws were dropped is an understatement. But we soon realized that this is the way of the people. Going out of their way to make sure you are okay.
Walking here isn't like walking at home. Roads aren't paved and paths are narrow steep and muddy. He would always show us where to walk so we wouldn't get hurt and if he heard our feet slip he immediately turned around to see if we were okay. Our other translator was the same way! They all wanted to get the news out and so we went and we found the kindest people I've ever met.
I could have stayed on top of that mtn. I could have married a local and never come home. I cried leaving them and I'll be back again one day. My heart aches for these people and being with the ministries here as well would be totally amazing! I contemplated chaining myself to the building and the team thought about saying we got lost in the mtns for the rest of our time because in no way did we want to leave.
Life changing doesn't even begin to describe this past week.
Sunday, September 11, 2011
A Fathers Heart
This week was on the father heart of God. I totally thought that this week would be full of warm and fuzzy feelings. That it would be like sitting inside on a rainy day with a good book in front of the fire place. And I was super happy to think that feeling was coming. The weeks are good here, but they are intense (in a very good way), but I was looking forward to an easy week talking of God's love. Instead I got a very heavy, rude awakening.
This week all the DTS's were combined so we had about 70 people together. Weeks when we are combined are some of my favorite because even though we all live together and see each other daily, our days can get pretty busy and soon you find that you haven't talked to your friend in another DTS because you get busy. So weeks together are always fun and this week proved to be especially good.
Our speaker is from New Zealand and has an islander background. He reminded me of a big teddy bear. He is very funny and brought a certain kind of joy and light to the room. He started off the week fairly light and talked about how DTS is all about the heart. And how we have to get our hearts right before we can get the rest of us right.
Monday night for our weekly night lecture he started to go into detail about the heart. How the heart always remembers. Our minds may not remember a certain circumstance but our heart does. Our heart carries the wounds from life. Out of the heart flow, well, out of them flow everything. He talked about how our hearts remember and are wounded from life. These wounds usually don't get cleaned out or fixed which leave us wounded with scar tissue. The thing about scar tissue is that is stop growth of any kind in that area of life.
As soon as he said this I started to cry. For the first time I saw areas of my life I thought I had figured out and had dealt with were actually deeply scared. And I had just pushed these issues so far down that I could no longer feel them anymore, but I still had areas that I needed to work from it.
That night started the cry fest that happened daily with me. I realized areas in my life that I needed help in. I needed to get right. I have been hurt from people and when I thought I was dealing with that pain. Instead I was just pushing it farther down inside myself. So this week opened a lot of doors to who I am and what I have been experiencing for the last 21 years.
Although I cried everyday, they were tears of healing. And although they were painful they were good. And I have jumped huge steps in this past week.
One of the things we were learned is how we live in a fallen world and what that looks like. The fallen perspectives of femininity and masculinity. These ways have caused us to cause pain to others and to ourselves. Not living up to God's standards in situations and living by what the world deems to be right. We had application on this and there was a lot of crying and hugging. The guys stood in front of the girls and apologized for all the guys that have ever hurt us. As we sat there and cried and the guys stood in silence while our speaker spoke pain was being healed. The girls then went to pray for the boys, we prayed over (more like under since most of them are taller than us) them and prayed true masculinity into them. There were more tears then big hugs. Hugs that were so good. For me it was like hugging my brother and being able to feel safe by their side. They stood by us and helped us.
It was a good day. Afterwards we danced. It was great. We joked all week how application is usually on Friday, this week we got application everyday. Friday we did do application which consisted of a lot of dancing. We learned a couple of island dances and did a war haka as well. It was a week full of growth for me.
I learned so much about myself and my past. I had enough tears to fill a baby pool I'm sure. I loved every minute of it though. I had a painful, yet amazing week. It was good.
This week all the DTS's were combined so we had about 70 people together. Weeks when we are combined are some of my favorite because even though we all live together and see each other daily, our days can get pretty busy and soon you find that you haven't talked to your friend in another DTS because you get busy. So weeks together are always fun and this week proved to be especially good.
Our speaker is from New Zealand and has an islander background. He reminded me of a big teddy bear. He is very funny and brought a certain kind of joy and light to the room. He started off the week fairly light and talked about how DTS is all about the heart. And how we have to get our hearts right before we can get the rest of us right.
Monday night for our weekly night lecture he started to go into detail about the heart. How the heart always remembers. Our minds may not remember a certain circumstance but our heart does. Our heart carries the wounds from life. Out of the heart flow, well, out of them flow everything. He talked about how our hearts remember and are wounded from life. These wounds usually don't get cleaned out or fixed which leave us wounded with scar tissue. The thing about scar tissue is that is stop growth of any kind in that area of life.
As soon as he said this I started to cry. For the first time I saw areas of my life I thought I had figured out and had dealt with were actually deeply scared. And I had just pushed these issues so far down that I could no longer feel them anymore, but I still had areas that I needed to work from it.
That night started the cry fest that happened daily with me. I realized areas in my life that I needed help in. I needed to get right. I have been hurt from people and when I thought I was dealing with that pain. Instead I was just pushing it farther down inside myself. So this week opened a lot of doors to who I am and what I have been experiencing for the last 21 years.
Although I cried everyday, they were tears of healing. And although they were painful they were good. And I have jumped huge steps in this past week.
One of the things we were learned is how we live in a fallen world and what that looks like. The fallen perspectives of femininity and masculinity. These ways have caused us to cause pain to others and to ourselves. Not living up to God's standards in situations and living by what the world deems to be right. We had application on this and there was a lot of crying and hugging. The guys stood in front of the girls and apologized for all the guys that have ever hurt us. As we sat there and cried and the guys stood in silence while our speaker spoke pain was being healed. The girls then went to pray for the boys, we prayed over (more like under since most of them are taller than us) them and prayed true masculinity into them. There were more tears then big hugs. Hugs that were so good. For me it was like hugging my brother and being able to feel safe by their side. They stood by us and helped us.
It was a good day. Afterwards we danced. It was great. We joked all week how application is usually on Friday, this week we got application everyday. Friday we did do application which consisted of a lot of dancing. We learned a couple of island dances and did a war haka as well. It was a week full of growth for me.
I learned so much about myself and my past. I had enough tears to fill a baby pool I'm sure. I loved every minute of it though. I had a painful, yet amazing week. It was good.
Sunday, August 28, 2011
Future
So I don't know how detailed I will get here, still waiting on God for timing but I'll let you in on a little bit.
So two weeks ago we learned about relationships and how they effect our everyday life. It was good. It was hard. God has been showing me ever since coming here how I relate to people and how it can be good or bad and I've spent a lot of time working on that and getting better at them. Our speaker was the base leader and she has such a loving presence. When she talks it feels like she is the only talking to you. She has deep insight and totally spoke through the Holy Spirit. One day we all stood and just prayed out what we were feeling and what we were working through and then broke out in singing. It was such a good moment. That week we were combined with all the DTS's, and those weeks are always good. Hearing the different questions from everyone and being with everyone is awesome. That week it really hit me that I put my nationality in God, I'm not an American, but a child of God. And I need to hold on to that.
This week we had missions. Our speaker has been in YWAM for 40 years and pioneered all of France and French speaking Africa. I think I sat with my jaw dropped almost the entire week. His stories and insights were amazing and really encouraged me in what God is calling me to do. He talked about how the first outreach he ever led into Africa, they were driving through the Sahara desert for two months and for lunch every day they would eat liver paste, sardines, and stale bread. I thought I would have died through that. But as I thought that God spoke to me and said, "yes you could." It was crazy. Whenever Joe would speak about these crazy missions situations and I thought I could never do it, every time God stepped in and gave me comfort that I could do it.
One thing that stuck with me all week is "We need to answer God's calling for us, not the need that we see." This hit home. Being here I see tons of ministry's and tons of needs. I see needs at home that need to be helped. I see people all over the world that need help, a guest speakers come in and talk about all these needs, and I want to be the answer to all of them. But Joe was right. We need to make sure we are answering God's calling for us and not answering the need that we see. Everywhere you turn there will be a need that needs to be met, but in reality that's not what God is calling me to. God is calling me to a specific need in a specific place.
I won't go into too much detail about what God is calling me to do. I am still telling people close to my the situation and what will happen, but in a couple weeks time I'll let you know what is going on in more detailed. To explain a little better I'll talk about what Joe shared with us at Friday Night Meeting.
Joe talked about be servant hearted vs. an individual. Long story short (and what really hit me) was the thought of how we view success and acceptance. To a degree we all base acceptance based on the success we have, esp in the western world. Whether or not someone has verbally told you or not, the thought that we will be successful based on what we do is true. This success will then lead to people accepting you. We are told from a young age or are exposed at a young age to people who are "successful". These people are usually business men, or have a 9-5 job, or in the military. People think that jobs will bring success.
We have this idea that the better we do the more people will like us. Now I'm not saying all people think or feel this, but most do. And in a way I'm one of them. People throughout my life have told me I need to get a college degree if nothing else. I could flip burgers at McDonalds, but I needed to get a college degree. This view on life stuck with me. When I was called to do missions three years ago, I was about to head off to school and totally put missions on hold, cause I knew that I needed to get a degree first. I'm one semester away from finishing school. One semester from a piece of paper.
That piece of paper isn't bad. I know plenty of people who are called to work at a desk from 9-5. Who their mission field is their work place. However, I've never felt like school was for me. I've always just done it because that was what was expected of me. I know see that that's not the case. My place may not be to get that piece of paper. God has told me "it's just a piece of paper." He didn't say I would never get it. I just need to give up that piece of paper because He has something much bigger for me in store. So for now. I've given up that right to that piece of paper.
Now I do know what God is calling me to do. I'm not too sure on the timing yet so it could very easily be that I will go back home and do my last semester and then go out for God. But it could be that I'll be home through my friends wedding and leaving again. All I know is that there is something much bigger than that piece of paper for me right now.
As I let people know about what is going on I will let everyone out there in cyber space know more.
I love you all. Please don't take offense if you are going to college and getting a degree. I'm proud of you for it. But that's not God's calling for me. His calling for me has nothing to do with a degree and He really has shown me that I need to give up the right to an education. I have no right to an education. I'm blessed as it is to be able to read and write this conversation when people all over the world have died without knowing how to even recognize their name.
God really is working on me. Really is changing me in such a good way. Showing me all that I am going to become and what I need to be. He is so so good. And moving and growing me and making me into a person that I've always wanted to be, but was too constrained by acceptance to get there. Too stressed trying to get my degree on time so I could forget about it so I could go onto what God is calling me to do.
Again please feel free to email me about anything tinagittus@yahoo.com.
Practically we leave for outreach in just a few short weeks. It may be four weeks away but to be honest weeks are flying by and I don't know where time is going. I'm afraid to blink because I know that if I do I'll be at the air port in New Zealand waiting to fly home. We will fly to Nathan first and then Thaddeus after 7 weeks. We'll be in Thailand for four weeks, then back to Perth. I won't have my computer with me while on outreach. I'll be leaving it with someone here. We will be climbing the mountains in Nepal and even though my computer is light, I don't want or need any additional pounds on me. I will have my iphone and can get internet on that and I'm sure internet cafe's will be my friend. But just so you know contact while I'm gone will be much harder for me.
I LOVE you all and MISS you all, but I wouldn't trade the world for the experience that I'm having here.
So two weeks ago we learned about relationships and how they effect our everyday life. It was good. It was hard. God has been showing me ever since coming here how I relate to people and how it can be good or bad and I've spent a lot of time working on that and getting better at them. Our speaker was the base leader and she has such a loving presence. When she talks it feels like she is the only talking to you. She has deep insight and totally spoke through the Holy Spirit. One day we all stood and just prayed out what we were feeling and what we were working through and then broke out in singing. It was such a good moment. That week we were combined with all the DTS's, and those weeks are always good. Hearing the different questions from everyone and being with everyone is awesome. That week it really hit me that I put my nationality in God, I'm not an American, but a child of God. And I need to hold on to that.
This week we had missions. Our speaker has been in YWAM for 40 years and pioneered all of France and French speaking Africa. I think I sat with my jaw dropped almost the entire week. His stories and insights were amazing and really encouraged me in what God is calling me to do. He talked about how the first outreach he ever led into Africa, they were driving through the Sahara desert for two months and for lunch every day they would eat liver paste, sardines, and stale bread. I thought I would have died through that. But as I thought that God spoke to me and said, "yes you could." It was crazy. Whenever Joe would speak about these crazy missions situations and I thought I could never do it, every time God stepped in and gave me comfort that I could do it.
One thing that stuck with me all week is "We need to answer God's calling for us, not the need that we see." This hit home. Being here I see tons of ministry's and tons of needs. I see needs at home that need to be helped. I see people all over the world that need help, a guest speakers come in and talk about all these needs, and I want to be the answer to all of them. But Joe was right. We need to make sure we are answering God's calling for us and not answering the need that we see. Everywhere you turn there will be a need that needs to be met, but in reality that's not what God is calling me to. God is calling me to a specific need in a specific place.
I won't go into too much detail about what God is calling me to do. I am still telling people close to my the situation and what will happen, but in a couple weeks time I'll let you know what is going on in more detailed. To explain a little better I'll talk about what Joe shared with us at Friday Night Meeting.
Joe talked about be servant hearted vs. an individual. Long story short (and what really hit me) was the thought of how we view success and acceptance. To a degree we all base acceptance based on the success we have, esp in the western world. Whether or not someone has verbally told you or not, the thought that we will be successful based on what we do is true. This success will then lead to people accepting you. We are told from a young age or are exposed at a young age to people who are "successful". These people are usually business men, or have a 9-5 job, or in the military. People think that jobs will bring success.
We have this idea that the better we do the more people will like us. Now I'm not saying all people think or feel this, but most do. And in a way I'm one of them. People throughout my life have told me I need to get a college degree if nothing else. I could flip burgers at McDonalds, but I needed to get a college degree. This view on life stuck with me. When I was called to do missions three years ago, I was about to head off to school and totally put missions on hold, cause I knew that I needed to get a degree first. I'm one semester away from finishing school. One semester from a piece of paper.
That piece of paper isn't bad. I know plenty of people who are called to work at a desk from 9-5. Who their mission field is their work place. However, I've never felt like school was for me. I've always just done it because that was what was expected of me. I know see that that's not the case. My place may not be to get that piece of paper. God has told me "it's just a piece of paper." He didn't say I would never get it. I just need to give up that piece of paper because He has something much bigger for me in store. So for now. I've given up that right to that piece of paper.
Now I do know what God is calling me to do. I'm not too sure on the timing yet so it could very easily be that I will go back home and do my last semester and then go out for God. But it could be that I'll be home through my friends wedding and leaving again. All I know is that there is something much bigger than that piece of paper for me right now.
As I let people know about what is going on I will let everyone out there in cyber space know more.
I love you all. Please don't take offense if you are going to college and getting a degree. I'm proud of you for it. But that's not God's calling for me. His calling for me has nothing to do with a degree and He really has shown me that I need to give up the right to an education. I have no right to an education. I'm blessed as it is to be able to read and write this conversation when people all over the world have died without knowing how to even recognize their name.
God really is working on me. Really is changing me in such a good way. Showing me all that I am going to become and what I need to be. He is so so good. And moving and growing me and making me into a person that I've always wanted to be, but was too constrained by acceptance to get there. Too stressed trying to get my degree on time so I could forget about it so I could go onto what God is calling me to do.
Again please feel free to email me about anything tinagittus@yahoo.com.
Practically we leave for outreach in just a few short weeks. It may be four weeks away but to be honest weeks are flying by and I don't know where time is going. I'm afraid to blink because I know that if I do I'll be at the air port in New Zealand waiting to fly home. We will fly to Nathan first and then Thaddeus after 7 weeks. We'll be in Thailand for four weeks, then back to Perth. I won't have my computer with me while on outreach. I'll be leaving it with someone here. We will be climbing the mountains in Nepal and even though my computer is light, I don't want or need any additional pounds on me. I will have my iphone and can get internet on that and I'm sure internet cafe's will be my friend. But just so you know contact while I'm gone will be much harder for me.
I LOVE you all and MISS you all, but I wouldn't trade the world for the experience that I'm having here.
Saturday, August 13, 2011
It's been a while
As the weeks go on the faster they go! I can't believe that I've been here for six weeks and am heading into my seventh week of schooling!
Two weeks ago we talked about Lordship and laying down all our rights. It was an intense week and so freeing. It was a struggle and some of us still struggle with what we gave up. There are times I struggle with it as well, but it's good to have it gone. Our speaker told us that God gives us grace. But grace just isn't something that we don't deserve but also the ability to make it through the hard times. It's our help when we struggle. That hit me hard and made me appreciate that week. It has opened us all up, opened me up more freely to what God wants in my life.
This past week we covered evangalism. It's something that I have done before and knew about but it was great to get more information on it. Our speaker was from Canada originally and has been running a YWAM base on the east side of Australia with his wife for 13 years. He is a surfer and so I totally got how he taught. It was great to talk with a surfer as well. I really haven't had the urge to surf since I've been here, that is until I talked to him. I totally want to go out and hit it hard but at the moment it's raining again so I will have to wait til December when it's summer here (that's such a weird concept for me).
It was really good. On Wednesday our speaker brought up something that has been a passion for me for three years now and on Friday it was confirmed what it is and that it will be mine. I know that kind of leaves you hanging on what is going on, but I will tell more as it comes. It was def a huge blow to me. I wasn't expecting what was coming. It's something that I have dreamed of for a while but I always thought of it as my pipe dream and that I would be a wife a mom and a teacher. And I'm sure those things will come true as well but for now this is going to happen.
It's been a crazy two weeks. God has spoken so much to me about myself and what He wants for me. It's crazy. He's been giving me a heart for things that I never expected. On Monday I was in tears over the thought of prostitutes and the thought that they only think they are good enough for what someone will pay for them. I'm not joking I cried four times on Monday at the thought. On Thursday we got together as a base and prayed for the new building. We still need finance for it and came together to work towards it. SO MUCH IMPACT. Coming together to fight for something we all want to see was so good, and so intense. At one point we got in a huge circle and were praying and running around the circle (the kids led us!) and then when we all gathered back in our Island Breeze boys did their war chant for God. I'm telling you this, if you want to see God move, walk into the boys during a war chant. It was sooooo goooooooddddd! It made me want to go out and save the world and run a marathon.
Things here aren't the same as back home. I miss home. and there is nothing wrong with home. But it's good to be around the people that I am. It's great when I have a headache or I just burnt my fingers on a pan (because I'm smart and didn't use a hot pad to touch the hot pan) to have people around you stop and pray for you. I like that it's normal to see people around with their Bibles or hear the music DTS practicing. I love it. I don't think this is going to be home forever, but it's good to be here now. I'm growing so much and learning so much about myself. I love staying with all my girls. I love trying new things.
Be amazed. I ate fish the other night for dinner. It was a small piece but I still ate it. I also have learned to like coffee. I don't love it yet, but it def makes me feel warm and happy and awake during class. I also have learned to love yogurt. Theses all are little things but they are all new and different for me. Anyways. All is good and well. One day I'll sit down and actually write a post that makes sense!
LOVE YOU ALL AND MISS YOU ALL!!!!!
Two weeks ago we talked about Lordship and laying down all our rights. It was an intense week and so freeing. It was a struggle and some of us still struggle with what we gave up. There are times I struggle with it as well, but it's good to have it gone. Our speaker told us that God gives us grace. But grace just isn't something that we don't deserve but also the ability to make it through the hard times. It's our help when we struggle. That hit me hard and made me appreciate that week. It has opened us all up, opened me up more freely to what God wants in my life.
This past week we covered evangalism. It's something that I have done before and knew about but it was great to get more information on it. Our speaker was from Canada originally and has been running a YWAM base on the east side of Australia with his wife for 13 years. He is a surfer and so I totally got how he taught. It was great to talk with a surfer as well. I really haven't had the urge to surf since I've been here, that is until I talked to him. I totally want to go out and hit it hard but at the moment it's raining again so I will have to wait til December when it's summer here (that's such a weird concept for me).
It was really good. On Wednesday our speaker brought up something that has been a passion for me for three years now and on Friday it was confirmed what it is and that it will be mine. I know that kind of leaves you hanging on what is going on, but I will tell more as it comes. It was def a huge blow to me. I wasn't expecting what was coming. It's something that I have dreamed of for a while but I always thought of it as my pipe dream and that I would be a wife a mom and a teacher. And I'm sure those things will come true as well but for now this is going to happen.
It's been a crazy two weeks. God has spoken so much to me about myself and what He wants for me. It's crazy. He's been giving me a heart for things that I never expected. On Monday I was in tears over the thought of prostitutes and the thought that they only think they are good enough for what someone will pay for them. I'm not joking I cried four times on Monday at the thought. On Thursday we got together as a base and prayed for the new building. We still need finance for it and came together to work towards it. SO MUCH IMPACT. Coming together to fight for something we all want to see was so good, and so intense. At one point we got in a huge circle and were praying and running around the circle (the kids led us!) and then when we all gathered back in our Island Breeze boys did their war chant for God. I'm telling you this, if you want to see God move, walk into the boys during a war chant. It was sooooo goooooooddddd! It made me want to go out and save the world and run a marathon.
Things here aren't the same as back home. I miss home. and there is nothing wrong with home. But it's good to be around the people that I am. It's great when I have a headache or I just burnt my fingers on a pan (because I'm smart and didn't use a hot pad to touch the hot pan) to have people around you stop and pray for you. I like that it's normal to see people around with their Bibles or hear the music DTS practicing. I love it. I don't think this is going to be home forever, but it's good to be here now. I'm growing so much and learning so much about myself. I love staying with all my girls. I love trying new things.
Be amazed. I ate fish the other night for dinner. It was a small piece but I still ate it. I also have learned to like coffee. I don't love it yet, but it def makes me feel warm and happy and awake during class. I also have learned to love yogurt. Theses all are little things but they are all new and different for me. Anyways. All is good and well. One day I'll sit down and actually write a post that makes sense!
LOVE YOU ALL AND MISS YOU ALL!!!!!
Saturday, July 30, 2011
AND I'M GOING TO
sorry that was mean. I still cannot reveal where I am going on outreach. I will be able to tell you all when the teams are finalized, hopefully on Monday or Tuesday. I’m confident on where God wants me to go. He told me a year ago and gave me a heart for this country. I didn’t understand it at the time but now it makes perfect sense. I am very excited and about to burst but I have to wait but as soon as I can tell I will.
This week we talked about intercession and worship. Intercession is standing in the gap and praying for someone. But this isn’t a “thank you Jesus for this person or place and may you bless them.” It’s basically combative prayer. It was sooo good. Really intense and just what I needed to hear. It gave me a new found love for prayer and showed me the tools and ways that I can do it effectively. Worship was also so good.
The three DTS schools were combined this week for class. It was good for us all to get together and learn. Since the July DTS girls all live apart from the rest of the girls in DTS it can be hard to get to know and to be honest I didn’t know many of them before this week. Simply because our paths never crossed. Worship with all three was crazy! Dancing and singing and clapping and shouting. Good times all around.
This week was a little difficult for me. On Sunday last week my throat was awful and then I got a two day dripping and congested nose. It was no fun at all. I had really hard times breathing and sleep just wasn’t my friend. I had many pray for me and after a few days I was back to normal but it def wasn’t easy feeling sick while trying to learn and go through my day.
I don’t think I can stress enough how much I am learning here. Classes are only two and half hours each day but they are so jammed packed with information. I feel like my brain turns into mush some days from what I just learned. It’s a great feeling. This week Cliff (our speaker this week) shared with us about Narnia. Yep, The Lion Witch and the Wardrobe. He told about all the symbolism in it. How the battle is raging. How we have to stand up and fight it. How if we don’t the battle will still rage on without me fighting. The movie makes so much more sense to me now. It challenged me. It made me realize that my prayer life does matter. My prayers do make a difference. They do mean something. I could be the only one in the world praying about a specific thing and for that reason alone I need to pray. And not just pray about my life and my future and all that jazz but pray for others. Don’t be broad in my prayers. But instead be very very specific in them. Make it a sniper shot. Make sure I hit the target to the best of my ability.
It was challenging but it also motivated me to be better at it. Every week has challenged me to be better. To do better. To apply what I’m learning, not just understand what I’m learning. I really do love it here. I told my best friend last week its everything that we wanted at home. I see people on fire for God. I’m not saying that YWAM is perfect or the people are perfect. Or that Vegas can’t be perfect or isn’t perfect. But here I get a concentrated number or people who all have a similar goal as me. To be as close to God as we can.
I have my faults and so do the people here. But something is different here. When learning we don’t hold on to that learning for a couple of days and forget about it. We apply it. And not just apply it for a few days but apply it so that it shows. Apply it over and over and over and over. Its challenging. It’s not always the most fun, but it’s what I need in my life right now. I LOVE it.
God is def working here. I’m seeing it. I’m feeling it. I like it.
The girls and I have been getting closer as well. We had a prayer time together on Wednesday night. It was good just to see where each other is at. We all get along well, at least that I can see we do. We laugh at each other and with each other all the time. We go out and hang out. They aren’t just my roommates they are family. We stick with each other. Comfort each other when the tears flow and pray for each other even when its not asked for.
Today one of my roommates and I went to an outlet mall together. I haven’t left this general area of town for over a week and was getting cabin fever and just needed to get out. I ended up finding a couple of shirts for under 4 dollars which made me really happy! But it was good to just get out and talk with her. Even though we share a bunk bed we don’t get much time to talk with each other so it was fun to just get out and enjoy the city.
We have been having some crazy rain ever since Wednesday night. It will literally downpour for ten minutes then stop. Then half an hour later it will rain. Then the sun comes out for a couple hours. Then downpour. It has def been fun trying to decide when the rain is going to come. The men that were on the boat sailing back to Western Australia did make it home okay. I heard that they had to be towed in. I’m not sure to what extent but they were at dinner on Thursday night and one celebrated a birthday on Friday.
I think I have rambled on for long enough so I’ll end it here.
PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE email me. For those of you in my college group or close to me I would love to hear what is going on in life. I do get onto facebook to check my messages and to maybe update my status but I don’t go to anyone’s profile so please let me know how you are doing, what is going on. I feel like I update everyone on my life and only my mom updates me on hers. Which I do love my mom and love hearing her day but I would love to hear about everyone elses day. Don’t worry about me feeling left out because I’m not at a certain event or because I miss a party or something. Those things don’t really matter to me. I just want to know how everyone is doing. Shoot I just want to know if most people are alive.
Wednesday, July 27, 2011
BIG NEWS!
so i know the locations for outreach. my team will be splitting into two groups to go and we get to choose where we are going based off of where God is telling us to go. for that reason my team members and i are not allowed to talk about it or post about it til we hand in our decisions on friday.
the first team will be doing 4 weeks in -----, 4 weeks in ------ (i don't know how to spell it, the country located within -----) and then coming back to perth for 3 weeks to meet needs here in the city and in the base.
the second team will be going to nathan for 7 weeks and then thaddeus for 4 weeks.
i know which team i will be going on. it was clear as soon as i was told the locations. God put this place on my heart a year ago and i have no idea why He did at the time, but now i understand.
i'll let you know. but if you could please pray for me and my team as we go through this decision and hearing from God process. it's a big step for us!
the first team will be doing 4 weeks in -----, 4 weeks in ------ (i don't know how to spell it, the country located within -----) and then coming back to perth for 3 weeks to meet needs here in the city and in the base.
the second team will be going to nathan for 7 weeks and then thaddeus for 4 weeks.
i know which team i will be going on. it was clear as soon as i was told the locations. God put this place on my heart a year ago and i have no idea why He did at the time, but now i understand.
i'll let you know. but if you could please pray for me and my team as we go through this decision and hearing from God process. it's a big step for us!
Sunday, July 24, 2011
Week 3
This week was all about Repentance and Forgiveness. To say the least it was intense. On Friday which is application day for us we had the opportunity to get up and pray in front of the class for forgiveness of sins. We also learned a lot about how we need to forgive those who have hurt us and make restitution those we have sin against. It was def a day of tears but after it relief came. It was only the first step though. Now comes making our relationships right with both God and everyone around us, from the past and the present.
Although the time was tough it was also encouraging. Seeing people from all over the world and from different cultures go up and hear their struggles, it bonded us. We all had similar hurts, sin, forgiveness, and problems. We all have a past and they usually aren’t our best moments. Given none of us perfect and everyone struggles, but to hear it confirmed that we are all the same, and no one is better than the other. And to be praying to the same God that would forgive us and bring peace to past hurts was encouraging. At the end of it we walked out a little drained from laying our lives out there for each other and for God but it was also bonded us in a way that can never be replaced or taken away.
The week had some key moments of making want to break down and cry. I had to write an email that was probably the hardest one I ever had to write, and the one I got in return was humbling but also very hard to read. I learned a lot this week, both about myself, and how relationships work. Although its been said a thousand times that forgiving isn’t forgetting this week made it clear that it’s not, and that it is a process that can take a very long time.
The week wasn’t a complete downer though. It was uplifting to get these things off our backs, off my back. And now we get to move on. Yesterday was Saturday and I was able to talk with my best friend from back at home for a couple hours and it was great to see her. There have been many moments that I wish she were here to hold my hand, or talk to, or share a funny moment with, but we are both doing what we need to do right now, so I understand that she’s not here. It was good to see her though and talk about life. I love having little communication with home, but I do love getting emails from people to hear what is going on. It’s almost like I’m reading a book. I’m not there to experience it, but knowing what happens gives me a taste of home.
We don’t have stars here from light pollution. It’s not as bad as Vegas but it helps that the city can be bright and the weather feels like California. I honestly have a hard time remembering where I am. I feel as though I’m at home. Not permanent home, at least not to my knowledge, but I don’t feel as though I’m an outsider. That is until I try and figure out what a kilogram is and how fast the speed limit is and that dollars are coins here and the money is unrippable.
All is good here. My throat is sore today. It feels like I have a post nasal drip, but there is nothing that is post about it. Just a dripping nose that is running to the back of my throat. Pray for that if you can. And pray that the exchange rate doesn’t get any higher and that the American dollar gains strength so that I can pay off all my outreach fees. I don’t know the exact cost of it yet, but if it is the full amount that I planned for I won’t have as much as I thought I did. I will have enough just not as much as I thought.
Friday, July 15, 2011
Week 2
This week was on the character and nature of God. It was really intense but in a good way. Class time is only 2-2 1/2 hours long but anymore time and I think my brain would explode. We dig really deep into the concepts and into the Bible. I'm really enjoying it here. I have a hard time most days to realize that I'm in Australia and not Southern California. The weather and the city are alike so it's hard for me some days to get a grip on where I am but I love it here so I don't spend much time thinking about it.
I love the worship here. It's crazy, but in a good way. We worship as a group three times a week. On Monday it's the whole base, and Wednesday and Friday the Sports DTS and my school get together for worship. It's a lot of fun. The songs are mostly what I know but there have been a few ones and I'm loving them.
Last night or Thursday night we do evangalism in the streets. The base breaks into groups and heads out. Our focus for this quarter is the homeless, poor and needy. My team goes to the hospital and a hostile run by the YMCA. Last night we just prayer walked and worshiped by each place. I think it will be a lot of fun. I have no problems starting conversations with people so we'll see how it goes.
I rode the train here for the first time. It def made me think I was in London for some reason, like Harry Potter... The money here really makes me think I'm living in Harry Potter land. One dollar and two dollars are in coins which is weird for me and the fifty cent piece is huge. It makes me feel like I'm really poor when I actually have like ten dollars, it's a new concept for me.
This week my family chores leader invited me over for tea at her place. I said sure, not really sure of what I was getting myself into but it was a great experience. We just sat and talked. Coming on this trip I was kind of worried cause I'm so used to not being around guys. There are four guys on my team but I'm not super close to any of them, which is def different for me. It wasn't until recently that I had really close girls as friends and more than just one. I've always been around guys. So I was worried knowing that there would be 16 girls on my team. But God has shown me that I can have females in my life that I rely on.
I've learned that there are strong women besides my mom that I can have accountability with. Don't get me wrong I'm sure that is a woman at the church that I could have as a mentor and rely on but it's never come about for it to happen. Here it helps that I'm forced to have a one on one (accountability partner), who I love, but that there are also a ton of older woman that I can talk to about what is going on and get advice about life, if I need it. Even if I don't need it they are here to comfort, support, and talk to.
I really love my job in hospo. There are days where all I do it laundry or iron but I like it. It gives me time to myself or to be around other girls (not that I'm deprived of that). Today I cleaned an iron and did dishes. May not be the most important job but it gave me time to bond with the other girl with me.
Bonding is very good especially because this is becoming my family while I'm away from family.
This weeks topic has really hit me. I knew most of the things we talked about but I now understand those concepts. Such things like God is love, kind, truthful, and faithful. I now know without a doubt these things. I can see where they have occurred in my life and in the Bible as well. I also get how "we are created in God's image." That was def a concept that I understand. On Wednesday we did a timeline (totally geeked out over it, I like timelines, I'm a history major) of how God's character and nature has been present and the same throughout the entire Bible. It gave me clarity about how God is an unchanging God and it also gave me really good insight to the Bible. I am not motivated to read the entire Old Testament. I feel like I have a better understanding of it and can read it now without it being so boring as I once thought it was. I get why Old Testament law is the way it is and how the New Testament covers those laws and put the same ones into practice into a different way.
Yeah, it's been good. Still don't know about outreach but I am continuing to pray about it and pray about London and what it's meaning in my life and how it will work out.
I love the worship here. It's crazy, but in a good way. We worship as a group three times a week. On Monday it's the whole base, and Wednesday and Friday the Sports DTS and my school get together for worship. It's a lot of fun. The songs are mostly what I know but there have been a few ones and I'm loving them.
Last night or Thursday night we do evangalism in the streets. The base breaks into groups and heads out. Our focus for this quarter is the homeless, poor and needy. My team goes to the hospital and a hostile run by the YMCA. Last night we just prayer walked and worshiped by each place. I think it will be a lot of fun. I have no problems starting conversations with people so we'll see how it goes.
I rode the train here for the first time. It def made me think I was in London for some reason, like Harry Potter... The money here really makes me think I'm living in Harry Potter land. One dollar and two dollars are in coins which is weird for me and the fifty cent piece is huge. It makes me feel like I'm really poor when I actually have like ten dollars, it's a new concept for me.
This week my family chores leader invited me over for tea at her place. I said sure, not really sure of what I was getting myself into but it was a great experience. We just sat and talked. Coming on this trip I was kind of worried cause I'm so used to not being around guys. There are four guys on my team but I'm not super close to any of them, which is def different for me. It wasn't until recently that I had really close girls as friends and more than just one. I've always been around guys. So I was worried knowing that there would be 16 girls on my team. But God has shown me that I can have females in my life that I rely on.
I've learned that there are strong women besides my mom that I can have accountability with. Don't get me wrong I'm sure that is a woman at the church that I could have as a mentor and rely on but it's never come about for it to happen. Here it helps that I'm forced to have a one on one (accountability partner), who I love, but that there are also a ton of older woman that I can talk to about what is going on and get advice about life, if I need it. Even if I don't need it they are here to comfort, support, and talk to.
I really love my job in hospo. There are days where all I do it laundry or iron but I like it. It gives me time to myself or to be around other girls (not that I'm deprived of that). Today I cleaned an iron and did dishes. May not be the most important job but it gave me time to bond with the other girl with me.
Bonding is very good especially because this is becoming my family while I'm away from family.
This weeks topic has really hit me. I knew most of the things we talked about but I now understand those concepts. Such things like God is love, kind, truthful, and faithful. I now know without a doubt these things. I can see where they have occurred in my life and in the Bible as well. I also get how "we are created in God's image." That was def a concept that I understand. On Wednesday we did a timeline (totally geeked out over it, I like timelines, I'm a history major) of how God's character and nature has been present and the same throughout the entire Bible. It gave me clarity about how God is an unchanging God and it also gave me really good insight to the Bible. I am not motivated to read the entire Old Testament. I feel like I have a better understanding of it and can read it now without it being so boring as I once thought it was. I get why Old Testament law is the way it is and how the New Testament covers those laws and put the same ones into practice into a different way.
Yeah, it's been good. Still don't know about outreach but I am continuing to pray about it and pray about London and what it's meaning in my life and how it will work out.
Sunday, July 10, 2011
Week 1
Normally posts wont be this long but since I haven’t updated this will be the first week and what the base is like. I promise to update more and more often so that they aren’t so long.
So it’s been a crazy week to say the least. Last Sunday we went to church and then went into town to shop. It was also the official start to school. On Monday we had orientation and then free time. Tuesday was registration day and then free time. Wednesday we started lectures. We went over hearing the voice of God. Our school leader taught us this week. It was very cool. I knew a lot of the stuff that we covered but something my leader said was “Relationship is love, and love is choice.” It def hit me in a very deep way.
Thursday and Friday we continued the lectures on hearing the voice of God. Each week we will have a different speaker and subject. The speaker can be someone from base or someone who flies in to speak to us. We go over many topics and I will tell you each one as the weeks go on. As part of the school we have to do a journal each week. The journal asks us different questions and we have to answer them. We get to be creative with them so there has been plenty of paint, crayons, markers, and magazine clippings flying around.
All the girls that are in my school are staying in the same place. It’s very nice. There are only four of us to a room and we all share a kitchen. There are also spare rooms so we have guests coming in and out all the time. It’s fun. We have a very cool patio with a bench and since most afternoons are nice it’s a perfect place to sit out and read or journal.
I’ve been surprised how much of a community we are here. We all pitch in to get things done. In order to better explain I’ll go over what a typical day looks like. At 6 am we have morning exercises for half an hour. We then have a break then at 8 we do family chores for half an hour. Then we either do worship or prayer as a school or a base. Then it’s morning tea and coffee. After that at 10 starts lectures and we go til lunch at 12:30. After lunch starts 2 hours of work duties and two hours of free time. Then at 5:30 is dinner. Then we have some kind of night activity like lecture, small groups or evangelism.
Family chores is half an hour everyday or some kind of work. Right now I’m outside cleaning the laneway or the main walkway that we use. Our team is about 10 people and we also clean the outside bathrooms. We do this as a base because if we do then we don’t have to get up early on Saturday and do three hours of chores. It also keeps the base really clean. There are other jobs and everything gets clean during this time. After three weeks we switch duties and move on to something else. It also makes us take pride in what we use and not abuse the base. It really does make it feel like home.
Work duties is more like a job. They gave us a survey of what we have done in the past or what we like to do. They then place us in that area as best as they can. I’ve been placed with hospitality or hospo. I really like it. We do anything from cooking cakes for the staff or cleaning up and setting up the rooms for guests. It’s the motherly group on the base. I like it. I ironed sheets and table clothes for 2 hours on Friday. I’m telling you if you have ever tried to iron a fitted sheet you know how difficult it can be. If you have never ironed a fitted sheet, go take off your sheet and try it. It’s harder than you think.
Saturday my school and I traveled to the beach for some bonding time and a sausage sizzle. It isn’t something that we will do every week but it was def fun to do the one time. The beach was so clear and even though it was winter the weather held out as we splashed in the water and took pictures. Towards the end it did get chilly and we were more than fine to pick up everything and head out but it was fun while we were there. The water is so clear and so blue! It was amazing!!!
After the beach we went to see kangaroos. There are only a couple of places you can see them in the city. They don’t randomly come hopping through at any moment I promise! But where we found them is a grave site. It’s also a park but where the kangaroos hop is the graveyard. They are still wild animals so we couldn’t get too close and they were more than happy to hop away everytime that we got close but it was still cool to see them. I was feet away from a kangaroo and seeing them hop is def a very cool sight to witness.. I did get a picture with one but the only reason he stood so still is because he was taking a poop. There is a place called kangaroo island where you can actually get up and pet them so hopefully we will make it out there.
The weather here is pretty chilly in the morning and at night but the day isn’t so bad. It’s a mixture between Vegas and California weather. Right now it’s raining which is good because this part of Australia has been in a drought so the rain is a blessing.
Today was a quiet, cold day. For the most part the weekends are our own. We get to do what we want and don’t usually have activities that we have to attend. Every three or four weeks we do have a weekend duty which would be like dishes or cooking or cleaning. I did mine today and worked in the kitchen.
It really is like a big family here. Birthdays are something to celebrate and you can sit down next to a stranger and be best friends by the end of it. The accents are also very cool. There are a 105 students this quarter with about 200 on staff with easily over 30 nations represented. The amount of work that is done is amazing both within the city and world wide. Worship is fun and prayer is always happening. There is a music DTS here so at any given point you will hear people singing or music played. At dinner the boys love to sing mumford and sons which just makes me laugh because them singing reminds me of all the boys back home.
We drink coffee and tea a lot here. I hate coffee but yet drink about a cup a day. (HINT HINT there is no starbucks here so if anyone wants to send me via packets I will kiss you when I get home).
With all the different languages here I’ve learned a lot. I’ve slowed down in speaking a lot so we can understand each other and we constantly tell each other how to say things or tell of customs from back home. My friend Joliene is Dutch and is constantly speaking Dutch to me on accident. We laugh about it every time. It’s been a fun experience to see how each other lives back at home and how similar we are.
I don’t really pick up the accents anymore and I don’t really hear Australian accents anymore. I have picked up some words from different countries like a gas station is a servo, salvation army is salvo (we love salvo and the salvo bin on base), sun glasses are sunnies, a beanie is a toque, my bladder is a blass, and if asked como es esta (I know no Spanish let alone how to write it besides like 10 words) answer with muy bonita or very beautiful instead. It’s been a lot of fun to talk with everyone.
Gary your music has been pulling me through here. I think I’ve listened to you everyday. It really has hit home some of your songs and have related to my lectures this week.
Kitty and Gavin, someone totally walked up to me and said “war eagle” as I was walking!!!!! I brought with me an Auburn University sweatshirt that was a gag gift from them but is way comfy so I brought it with.
Kristina I miss you like no other and John and Tony walking somewhere or eating a meal isn’t the same without Jon Jon and T.
The college group I miss you guys and our events and Tuesday nights but it’s like Tuesday night on crack here, it’s so intense in such a good way!
And of course I miss my mommy, step dad, and puppies but they already know that.
God is doing great things here and I’m totally excited to see where He takes me and my team! I will know outreach by the end of the month or soon after and as soon as I do I will let you know. On a personal note if you would please pray for me about London. I’m not sure why but it comes up and everytime it does I feel like something bigger is going to happen. I’m not sure what it means yet or if anything will come from it but it def is something that is stirring within me.
Wednesday, July 6, 2011
haha
so the last post was supposed to be titled "carb overlaod" not "card"
that's what tiredness will do to you!
that's what tiredness will do to you!
Monday, July 4, 2011
Card Overload
I'm here in Perth! It is seriously like southern California out here. The weather is just like Vegas winter. It's cold but not too bitter most days. Right now I'm outside in the shade and it's pretty nice!
My flights were amazing. The 8 hour layover in New Zealand was killer though! there is nothing to do in that air port worth wild and there is no free wifi which stinks. But I got here on Saturday night and got moved into my room. The July DTS girls are all staying in one house. Most of the other students here are staying in what we call 228. It's a huge building with two big rooms. In the rooms are just piles of bunk beds. There isn't much privacy and apparently it echos pretty bad so it's not always quiet.
However July DTS girls are in a house called Gladstone. It's a building that it more SoCal looking. I'll post pictures later so you get a better idea. there are four girls to a room and our showers and toilets are outside the house but in a closed area. again i'll post pictures later to give a better idea of what i'm living in. Base is a three minute walk from where I'm staying.
On sunday which was my first day the girls and i went to church here in town. It's called Metro church. It was pretty legit. It took place it what looks like an old theater. i really liked the service. After church we went to the grocery store and then had lunch at the base. we then ventured into town. its like california shopping areas. There are big office buildings and then shopping on the street level. It's kind of like what Fremont street would be if it wasn't so run down and had shops that didn't just sell vegas stuff. it was really fun.
Sunday night after dinner we had our first meeting as a class. We have 11 girls and two guys right now. We are maybe awaiting for another girl and we have a boy from Mexico coming to join us! We have a few different nationalities on the team. 3 Canadians, 6 Americans, 1 from Mexico, 1 from Holland, 1 from Sweden, 2 from Australia, 1 from South Korea, 1 from Germany, and i'm blanking if there is more. This includes our staff which is 4 females and 1 male. I'll talk about my team later.
Monday was orientation day and then my team went to King's Park which is like Central Park. It's huge and beautiful and has an amazing view of the Perth skyline.
I'm not going to lie i have a lot to say but am kind of tired. Just wanted to let everyone know I'm here, I'm alive, I'm loving it, I miss home but it feels like i'm just in California so it's not bad at all, it's beautiful and I'm loving it. Classes will start for me tomorrow.
I'll write more later! Love you all!
Oh about the title. We have a couple of bakery's that donate their bread to us at the end of the day so we have more bread than we need. Toast is what we usually have for breakfast. It's fun!
My flights were amazing. The 8 hour layover in New Zealand was killer though! there is nothing to do in that air port worth wild and there is no free wifi which stinks. But I got here on Saturday night and got moved into my room. The July DTS girls are all staying in one house. Most of the other students here are staying in what we call 228. It's a huge building with two big rooms. In the rooms are just piles of bunk beds. There isn't much privacy and apparently it echos pretty bad so it's not always quiet.
However July DTS girls are in a house called Gladstone. It's a building that it more SoCal looking. I'll post pictures later so you get a better idea. there are four girls to a room and our showers and toilets are outside the house but in a closed area. again i'll post pictures later to give a better idea of what i'm living in. Base is a three minute walk from where I'm staying.
On sunday which was my first day the girls and i went to church here in town. It's called Metro church. It was pretty legit. It took place it what looks like an old theater. i really liked the service. After church we went to the grocery store and then had lunch at the base. we then ventured into town. its like california shopping areas. There are big office buildings and then shopping on the street level. It's kind of like what Fremont street would be if it wasn't so run down and had shops that didn't just sell vegas stuff. it was really fun.
Sunday night after dinner we had our first meeting as a class. We have 11 girls and two guys right now. We are maybe awaiting for another girl and we have a boy from Mexico coming to join us! We have a few different nationalities on the team. 3 Canadians, 6 Americans, 1 from Mexico, 1 from Holland, 1 from Sweden, 2 from Australia, 1 from South Korea, 1 from Germany, and i'm blanking if there is more. This includes our staff which is 4 females and 1 male. I'll talk about my team later.
Monday was orientation day and then my team went to King's Park which is like Central Park. It's huge and beautiful and has an amazing view of the Perth skyline.
I'm not going to lie i have a lot to say but am kind of tired. Just wanted to let everyone know I'm here, I'm alive, I'm loving it, I miss home but it feels like i'm just in California so it's not bad at all, it's beautiful and I'm loving it. Classes will start for me tomorrow.
I'll write more later! Love you all!
Oh about the title. We have a couple of bakery's that donate their bread to us at the end of the day so we have more bread than we need. Toast is what we usually have for breakfast. It's fun!
Monday, June 20, 2011
Something So Big
My time is running out in the states. I'm trying to get everything cleaned, packed, put away, organized, bought, returned, thanked, tucked away, and on and on and on. It's controlled chaos and I'm trying to take it one day at a time and get a little done each day. I'm excited though. I'm anxious and worried and concerned and nervous, but underlying it all, I'm at peace. I know this is what God wants me to do. I know this is where I need to go. I know that this is His plan for my life right now and I'm excited. But it is hard leaving everything that I know for something I know really nothing about. But it will be an amazing adventure and for that I'm excited.
Back when my church told the staff what changes they were making and what all the planning they had been doing for, they had my friend Gary sing this song. The chorus simply says, "I want to do something, so big, it's destined to fail without you Lord, I want to fail without you Lord." This whole song is truly how this trip is for me. It was such a BIG undertaking for me. A big decision to do. To go without finishing my degree, which everyone told/tells me I need or I will fail. To go knowing that it was going to cost me $13,000. That's a lot for a broke college student. Knowing that six months away could/will/would change my whole life.
It was scary. But the whole time I knew that this is what I needed to do, and with that I relied on God to provide. I had no idea how in the world I would make thirteen thousand dollars. That's a really big amount. I got the idea to ask people for all their spare change, and with that alone I've made over $1,300. IN CHANGE. There is no reason or logic that I would get one thousand, three hundred dollars from change. I'm talking nickles, pennies, dimes, and quarters. I made over 13,000 pennies. It was easily twenty pounds of pennies. All the change was so heavy I had to enlist the help of my cousin to take it to the bank with me cause it was so heavy, and he only carried the dimes and nickles.
Then I talked to whoever would listen about my trip. I've received donations from a wide variety of people, some people I don't even know or have met before. That was God working. I didn't know how I would all the money, but I knew God would provide. And He did. I'm FULLY FUNDED.
I'm doing something, so big, that without God, I'm going to fail. I'm setting myself up to fail if I don't rely on him. I'm going to fail HARD if I don't rely on Him. It hasn't been a cake walk. It's been hard. I've wanted to just stay in bed and forget about the trip. But at the end of the day I know this is what I need to do.
So in ten days I'm going. I'm going on the trip of a lifetime. I'm going with the support of my family, friends, and church. I'm going to change the world. I'm going to plant seeds, show love, learn lots, and do a lot of traveling.
I'm going.
Back when my church told the staff what changes they were making and what all the planning they had been doing for, they had my friend Gary sing this song. The chorus simply says, "I want to do something, so big, it's destined to fail without you Lord, I want to fail without you Lord." This whole song is truly how this trip is for me. It was such a BIG undertaking for me. A big decision to do. To go without finishing my degree, which everyone told/tells me I need or I will fail. To go knowing that it was going to cost me $13,000. That's a lot for a broke college student. Knowing that six months away could/will/would change my whole life.
It was scary. But the whole time I knew that this is what I needed to do, and with that I relied on God to provide. I had no idea how in the world I would make thirteen thousand dollars. That's a really big amount. I got the idea to ask people for all their spare change, and with that alone I've made over $1,300. IN CHANGE. There is no reason or logic that I would get one thousand, three hundred dollars from change. I'm talking nickles, pennies, dimes, and quarters. I made over 13,000 pennies. It was easily twenty pounds of pennies. All the change was so heavy I had to enlist the help of my cousin to take it to the bank with me cause it was so heavy, and he only carried the dimes and nickles.
Then I talked to whoever would listen about my trip. I've received donations from a wide variety of people, some people I don't even know or have met before. That was God working. I didn't know how I would all the money, but I knew God would provide. And He did. I'm FULLY FUNDED.
I'm doing something, so big, that without God, I'm going to fail. I'm setting myself up to fail if I don't rely on him. I'm going to fail HARD if I don't rely on Him. It hasn't been a cake walk. It's been hard. I've wanted to just stay in bed and forget about the trip. But at the end of the day I know this is what I need to do.
So in ten days I'm going. I'm going on the trip of a lifetime. I'm going with the support of my family, friends, and church. I'm going to change the world. I'm going to plant seeds, show love, learn lots, and do a lot of traveling.
I'm going.
Saturday, June 4, 2011
Before the wall falls
It's been a while and for that I am sorry. I promise to update much more often while I am on my trip!!! To say the least life has been crazy in the last month. Let alone in the last week. I finished school at the beginning of May. I am finishing out my last weekend working at the church, I will still be volunteering there but need to take some me time and start preparing mentally and emotionally and spiritually for this trip. It's been a crazy one. Before I leave I will share my whole story about how the trip came to happen. It has taken three years and a lot of running to get there but I'm getting there. However, the past few days have been one to remember and facebook said my "how am i feeling" was too long so I decided to blog about it.
I was able to spend some time with a girl that I love to death but never really get to hang out with or see because life is busy and crazy. So we went out for lunch and to get our toes done on tuesday and had a really good time. As this trip gets closer I feel more at peace. It's a weird feeling cause I'm scared out of my mind about it, and I would be lying if I said I wasn't. I am more than excited for this trip but it is a huge step for me and so it's crazy to think about me leaving.
So I was able to go out with a friend and have a great time and then go to our weekly college bible study that night. As the night went on I felt more and more awful. It got to the point where I was going to have to leave the lesson, but I'm stubborn and stuck it out til the end and when I finally got home realized that I was sick. There was no way around it. I was SICK.
You may or may not know but I was planning to have a garage sale today to help with funds for the trip and there were a couple points I didn't think I was going to be able to pull it off. I was in bed with more symptoms than I care to list and probably you care to know about. Needless to say I'm a baby when I'm sick and it was no fun. I decided last night that I needed to have the sale before it reaches a 100 degrees here in Vegas so my mom and I woke up at 5 am to set up and put the show on.
We did very well and raised $265 from it. It was even more cool to see some of my fellow college students come out and look around and donate to me as well. But I thought it was cool that the majority of my sales were from random people who I didn't know. Garage sales don't usually raise that much and get what I did my mom and I were astounded and tired. We hulled what didn't sell to Goodwill and came home to shower and nap.
Now after being sick for four days and waking up at 5 am the last thing I needed was a sunburn to exhaust my body of everything, and for the record books my mom and tried to put on sun screen but it hated it and it didn't work. So yes, I am a little (lot) pink from the sale and that made me doubly tired.
I was able to spend some time with a girl that I love to death but never really get to hang out with or see because life is busy and crazy. So we went out for lunch and to get our toes done on tuesday and had a really good time. As this trip gets closer I feel more at peace. It's a weird feeling cause I'm scared out of my mind about it, and I would be lying if I said I wasn't. I am more than excited for this trip but it is a huge step for me and so it's crazy to think about me leaving.
So I was able to go out with a friend and have a great time and then go to our weekly college bible study that night. As the night went on I felt more and more awful. It got to the point where I was going to have to leave the lesson, but I'm stubborn and stuck it out til the end and when I finally got home realized that I was sick. There was no way around it. I was SICK.
You may or may not know but I was planning to have a garage sale today to help with funds for the trip and there were a couple points I didn't think I was going to be able to pull it off. I was in bed with more symptoms than I care to list and probably you care to know about. Needless to say I'm a baby when I'm sick and it was no fun. I decided last night that I needed to have the sale before it reaches a 100 degrees here in Vegas so my mom and I woke up at 5 am to set up and put the show on.
We did very well and raised $265 from it. It was even more cool to see some of my fellow college students come out and look around and donate to me as well. But I thought it was cool that the majority of my sales were from random people who I didn't know. Garage sales don't usually raise that much and get what I did my mom and I were astounded and tired. We hulled what didn't sell to Goodwill and came home to shower and nap.
Now after being sick for four days and waking up at 5 am the last thing I needed was a sunburn to exhaust my body of everything, and for the record books my mom and tried to put on sun screen but it hated it and it didn't work. So yes, I am a little (lot) pink from the sale and that made me doubly tired.
I worked at 4 like always. It was odd that no one was there when I got there but I figured since it was summer people were running a little late and that I got there early. When Jeanie got there to let me in she said she had to "ask me something and didn't want others to hear if they came in" so we stepped into a classroom and to my TOTAL surprise my coworkers and few of my friends that also volunteer in the childrens center were there to celebrate my last weekend at work. It was crazy. I think I was more shocked that Jeanie multiplied into all my coworkers in seconds than anything else.
It was just nice to sit and talk with my ladies and Mo and hang out and eat. They all wrote cards and wrote on a banner for me and just made me feel blessed. I honestly would not know how to put it into words how blessed I feel to have my job. I do not work many hours and I do not get paid millions, but that doesn't even cross my mind. I have amazing women surrounding me and supporting me. They all have a heart for children and I love being around them. Having been given this job was a blessing in disguise. I would have never thought that I would love this job as much as I do. I would have never gotten a party like I did today at any other job, and I wouldn't be surrounded by amazing people like I was.
It was just a reminder how lucky I am. And how God really wants me to go on this trip and how much even though it's crazy for me to think about me going on this trip, I know it what He wants and He's providing in many ways. Spoiler alert who are reading this before church on Sunday but the sermon at church this weekend was about how when the walls of Jerrico fell the Israelite's shouted for victory before the wall ever fell. They knew God's will in their lives and they knew that they had to walk around the wall and shout in order to do His will. So they shouted for victory and by faith God made those walls fall. And that is a miracle.
Going back I remember when I made my budget for this trip and realized it was going to cost $13,000 dollars to go on this trip and I thought I was crazy to think that I could come up with that amount of money. And there is no reason why I should have raised as much as I have if I didn't have God. Plain and simple. I knew I had to do this, I knew I had to go. There wasn't a doubt in me that I had to go, and so I walked around the walls for 10 months. Just walking. Cause that was the will and I knew I had to do it. It was hard, but I knew that at the end of the day God needed me to go. So now I'm yelling and God is providing in SO many ways.
I have friends and family that support me so much it hurts to think that I'm leaving them. I have a church that supports me and gave me a job when I lost mine and gave me an amazing work environment and co workers. He's provided the money that I need for this trip and I could tell you logically where it's all come from, but there's reason that I should have raised over a thousand dollars from coins alone. I can't tell you how a few dollars that gets handed to me is multiplied in thousands but it has. And for that I am thankful. And i'm walking. And I will continue to walk and yell until I fulfill God's will.
Wednesday, April 13, 2011
Words of Encouragement
Often times in life I feel as though many people don't ever have anything nice to say. I sit next to a girl in one of my classes and she really never has said anything that would be considered encouraging about another person. Usually it's putting someone else down. When talking about people she knows she has positive things to say but generally negativity comes out of her mouth. I find at times I can be the same way. There are times that I just want to focus on others problems or say mean things because in the end it doesn't hurt me to say them. But if someone found out that I said something negative about them it would probably hurt their feelings.
I think as a society and as Christians, and as individuals we can do, I can do so much better. Since the start of the year I try to say something positive or encouraging to anyone that helps me. Mostly people who make my food or ring me up at the store. After working in sales I know how unappreciative people can be, so I try my best to at least say thank you if not more.
I know I wrote about this earlier in this blog about how we need to love more as a society but even then we need to watch what we say. In James it talks about how our mouth can have a tremendous effect on others. And it's true. What our mouth says, says a lot about us. People can tell if we are positive or negative by just listening to what we say. People will decide if they want to be close to us or if they want to ignore us by what we say. We have to watch ourselves.
On thing that I have been totally blessed with is people who always have positive things to say. I have a lot of guy friends that I'm close with and never once have they had anything truly mean to say about me. Can they be harsh? Yes, of course, they are boys and they don't always realize that they are talking to a girl. But when all is said and done, those boys make sure I know what's what and that I'm important. They let me know that I'm beautiful. That I'm wanted. That I'm a good friend. They tell me all these things because they know they should and they want to say them.
And I have awesome parents that let me know I'm doing good in my life. They are encouraging and supportive to what I want to do in life and the decisions I am making in my life. I couldn't thank my mom enough for being an awesome mom who shows her appreciation to me on a daily basis.
But often times, the people around us don't have such people in their lives to give them positive encouraging words. I had a deep conversation with someone close to me a few weeks ago and I found out that they never really had any sort of encouraging words said to them. They had positive things said to them before but it wasn't consistent. It wasn't an all the time thing. They didn't know they were appreciated. They didn't know that they were cared for, they didn't know how much I cared for them. Their self worth was never really shown to this individual. It broke my heart, it really did. Someone this close to me and they never knew worth or value in their life. And this is someone in the church.
It was a slap in the face that I needed to be more encouraging in my words. I needed to make it apparent my appreciation for others and let them know verbally that I cared for them instead of just assuming that they knew my appreciation for them.
Working at the church I have found out that sometimes people just take it for granted what church employees do. They work their butts off and mostly it goes unnoticed. The same goes for volunteers who give up their time. People don't see the effort others make or know how much we put into planning lessons or how we have learned that we need to teach the kids in individual ways. I had a work meeting last week (8 women all in one room) and my boss started to tell us how much she really appreciated us. Then she started to cry. Which of course made us all cry (again 8 women all in one room). And it was uplifting to hear how much my boss and her assistant really do appreciate the work we do. Even if the parents don't always show it, my boss sees the hard work we put in to teach the kids about God. It was positive encouraging words that we all needed to hear.
So I think you can guess the importance or words. Especially encouraging words. And that I shouldn't ramble on anymore. So my challenge to all of you who read this post is to go out and say at least one positive thing to everyone that you come into contact with in one day. Just try it one day. If someone makes you food, thank them. If your kids do something good, tell them. If your neighbor lets their dog pee on your lawn, tell them that you would prefer them not to let their dog do that and that you love their front lawn. Tell everyone one thing positive. Doesn't have to be a big thing, but something positive goes a long way!
I'm telling you, it will make an impact. You may not see the difference but it does make an impact. (Trust me, people who are around my age, if someone older rings you up at a store and you say "Thank you ma'am/sir" you will probably see complete and utter shock on their face because someone actually had good manners."
I think as a society and as Christians, and as individuals we can do, I can do so much better. Since the start of the year I try to say something positive or encouraging to anyone that helps me. Mostly people who make my food or ring me up at the store. After working in sales I know how unappreciative people can be, so I try my best to at least say thank you if not more.
I know I wrote about this earlier in this blog about how we need to love more as a society but even then we need to watch what we say. In James it talks about how our mouth can have a tremendous effect on others. And it's true. What our mouth says, says a lot about us. People can tell if we are positive or negative by just listening to what we say. People will decide if they want to be close to us or if they want to ignore us by what we say. We have to watch ourselves.
On thing that I have been totally blessed with is people who always have positive things to say. I have a lot of guy friends that I'm close with and never once have they had anything truly mean to say about me. Can they be harsh? Yes, of course, they are boys and they don't always realize that they are talking to a girl. But when all is said and done, those boys make sure I know what's what and that I'm important. They let me know that I'm beautiful. That I'm wanted. That I'm a good friend. They tell me all these things because they know they should and they want to say them.
And I have awesome parents that let me know I'm doing good in my life. They are encouraging and supportive to what I want to do in life and the decisions I am making in my life. I couldn't thank my mom enough for being an awesome mom who shows her appreciation to me on a daily basis.
But often times, the people around us don't have such people in their lives to give them positive encouraging words. I had a deep conversation with someone close to me a few weeks ago and I found out that they never really had any sort of encouraging words said to them. They had positive things said to them before but it wasn't consistent. It wasn't an all the time thing. They didn't know they were appreciated. They didn't know that they were cared for, they didn't know how much I cared for them. Their self worth was never really shown to this individual. It broke my heart, it really did. Someone this close to me and they never knew worth or value in their life. And this is someone in the church.
It was a slap in the face that I needed to be more encouraging in my words. I needed to make it apparent my appreciation for others and let them know verbally that I cared for them instead of just assuming that they knew my appreciation for them.
Working at the church I have found out that sometimes people just take it for granted what church employees do. They work their butts off and mostly it goes unnoticed. The same goes for volunteers who give up their time. People don't see the effort others make or know how much we put into planning lessons or how we have learned that we need to teach the kids in individual ways. I had a work meeting last week (8 women all in one room) and my boss started to tell us how much she really appreciated us. Then she started to cry. Which of course made us all cry (again 8 women all in one room). And it was uplifting to hear how much my boss and her assistant really do appreciate the work we do. Even if the parents don't always show it, my boss sees the hard work we put in to teach the kids about God. It was positive encouraging words that we all needed to hear.
So I think you can guess the importance or words. Especially encouraging words. And that I shouldn't ramble on anymore. So my challenge to all of you who read this post is to go out and say at least one positive thing to everyone that you come into contact with in one day. Just try it one day. If someone makes you food, thank them. If your kids do something good, tell them. If your neighbor lets their dog pee on your lawn, tell them that you would prefer them not to let their dog do that and that you love their front lawn. Tell everyone one thing positive. Doesn't have to be a big thing, but something positive goes a long way!
I'm telling you, it will make an impact. You may not see the difference but it does make an impact. (Trust me, people who are around my age, if someone older rings you up at a store and you say "Thank you ma'am/sir" you will probably see complete and utter shock on their face because someone actually had good manners."
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