Future

So I don't know how detailed I will get here, still waiting on God for timing but I'll let you in on a little bit.

So two weeks ago we learned about relationships and how they effect our everyday life.  It was good.  It was hard.  God has been showing me ever since coming here how I relate to people and how it can be good or bad and I've spent a lot of time working on that and getting better at them.  Our speaker was the base leader and she has such a loving presence.  When she talks it feels like she is the only talking to you.  She has deep insight and totally spoke through the Holy Spirit.  One day we all stood and just prayed out what we were feeling and what we were working through and then broke out in singing.  It was such a good moment.  That week we were combined with all the DTS's, and those weeks are always good.  Hearing the different questions from everyone and being with everyone is awesome. That week it really hit me that I put my nationality in God, I'm not an American, but a child of God.  And I need to hold on to that.

This week we had missions.  Our speaker has been in YWAM for 40 years and pioneered all of France and French speaking Africa.  I think I sat with my jaw dropped almost the entire week.  His stories and insights were amazing and really encouraged me in what God is calling me to do.  He talked about how the first outreach he ever led into Africa, they were driving through the Sahara desert for two months and for lunch every day they would eat liver paste, sardines, and stale bread.  I thought I would have died through that.  But as I thought that God spoke to me and said, "yes you could."  It was crazy.  Whenever Joe would speak about these crazy missions situations and I thought I could never do it, every time God stepped in and gave me comfort that I could do it.

One thing that stuck with me all week is "We need to answer God's calling for us, not the need that we see."  This hit home.  Being here I see tons of ministry's and tons of needs.  I see needs at home that need to be helped.  I see people all over the world that need help, a guest speakers come in and talk about all these needs, and I want to be the answer to all of them.  But Joe was right.  We need to make sure we are answering God's calling for us and not answering the need that we see.  Everywhere you turn there will be a need that needs to be met, but in reality that's not what God is calling me to.  God is calling me to a specific need in a specific place.

I won't go into too much detail about what God is calling me to do.  I am still telling people close to my the situation and what will happen, but in a couple weeks time I'll let you know what is going on in more detailed.  To explain a little better I'll talk about what Joe shared with us at Friday Night Meeting.

Joe talked about be servant hearted vs. an individual.  Long story short (and what really hit me) was the thought of how we view success and acceptance.  To a degree we all base acceptance based on the success we have, esp in the western world.  Whether or not someone has verbally told you or not, the thought that we will be successful based on what we do is true.  This success will then lead to people accepting you.  We are told from a young age or are exposed at a young age to people who are "successful".  These people are usually business men, or have a 9-5 job, or in the military.  People think that jobs will bring success.

We have this idea that the better we do the more people will like us.  Now I'm not saying all people think or feel this, but most do.  And in a way I'm one of them.  People throughout my life have told me I need to get a college degree if nothing else.  I could flip burgers at McDonalds, but I needed to get a college degree.  This view on life stuck with me.  When I was called to do missions three years ago, I was about to head off to school and totally put missions on hold, cause I knew that I needed to get a degree first.  I'm one semester away from finishing school.  One semester from a piece of paper.

That piece of paper isn't bad.  I know plenty of people who are called to work at a desk from 9-5.  Who their mission field is their work place.  However, I've never felt like school was for me.  I've always just done it because that was what was expected of me.  I know see that that's not the case.  My place may not be to get that piece of paper.  God has told me "it's just a piece of paper."  He didn't say I would never get it.  I just need to give up that piece of paper because He has something much bigger for me in store.  So for now.  I've given up that right to that piece of paper.

Now I do know what God is calling me to do.  I'm not too sure on the timing yet so it could very easily be that I will go back home and do my last semester and then go out for God.  But it could be that I'll be home through my friends wedding and leaving again.  All I know is that there is something much bigger than that piece of paper for me right now.

As I let people know about what is going on I will let everyone out there in cyber space know more.

I love you all.  Please don't take offense if you are going to college and getting a degree.  I'm proud of you for it.  But that's not God's calling for me.  His calling for me has nothing to do with a degree and He really has shown me that I need to give up the right to an education.  I have no right to an education.  I'm blessed as it is to be able to read and write this conversation when people all over the world have died without knowing how to even recognize their name. 

God really is working on me.  Really is changing me in such a good way.  Showing me all that I am going to become and what I need to be.  He is so so good.  And moving and growing me and making me into a person that I've always wanted to be, but was too constrained by acceptance to get there.  Too stressed trying to get my degree on time so I could forget about it so I could go onto what God is calling me to do.

Again please feel free to email me about anything tinagittus@yahoo.com.

Practically we leave for outreach in just a few short weeks.  It may be four weeks away but to be honest weeks are flying by and I don't know where time is going.  I'm afraid to blink because I know that if I do I'll be at the air port in New Zealand waiting to fly home.  We will fly to Nathan first and then Thaddeus after 7 weeks.  We'll be in Thailand for four weeks, then back to Perth.  I won't have my computer with me while on outreach.  I'll be leaving it with someone here.  We will be climbing the mountains in Nepal and even though my computer is light, I don't want or need any additional pounds on me.  I will have my iphone and can get internet on that and I'm sure internet cafe's will be my friend.  But just so you know contact while I'm gone will be much harder for me.

I LOVE you all and MISS you all, but I wouldn't trade the world for the experience that I'm having here.